Bruce Penton: TV cameras never stray far from Tiger Woods

By Bruce Penton

Since TV golf broadcasts usually begin with film and audio about Tiger Woods, no matter if the greatest golfer of all time is in the lead, middle of the pack or back home resting his back — “… Even though he’s not competing this week, let’s look at some Tiger highlights from last year’s event” — let’s join the party and start our 2020 Masters report with Tiger.

Why? Well, he didn’t win — Dustin Johnson did, but you already know that — but two things Woods did were among the most newsworthy happenings at Augusta.

First, he made a final-round 10 on the par-3 12th hole, the pivotal in 2019 when Woods took control of the tournament with a par while four of his closest rivals were putting their balls into Rae’s Creek and making either bogey or double bogey. Karma caught up to Woods this year with a seven-over-par 10. He dunked his first two shots into the creek, hit his third into a bunker over the green, nailed the next one back into the creek and … well, by this time, hands of the Tiger haters — yes, sadly, Tiger haters really exist — were starting to bleed from all the high-fiving they were doing in their living rooms or dens.

Second, however, illustrates why Tiger Woods is who he is: Following his embarrassing 10, which sent him from three under par for the tournament to four over — he proceeded to make birdies on 13, 15, 16, 17 and 18 to get back to one under par for the tournament.
It might have been the most amazing accomplishment of the week at Augusta and if you think I’m saying that just to irritate some of the Tiger haters among my circle of friends, you might be right. But it’s also true, and that’s just another reason why the TV networks never allow their cameras to stray too far from Woods. The most famous golfer in the world attracts viewers no matter where he sits on the leaderboard.

The next iteration of the Masters is scheduled to take place in just five months. If the coronavirus allows somewhat of a return to normalcy in our world, the 85th Masters will tee off in mid-April, a tradition unlike any other. And — sorry, haters — Tiger will continue to garner good chunk of the media attention.

  • Patti Dawn Swansson, aka the River City Renegade, on the laid-back Dustin Johnson: ”Johnson strikes me as the kind of guy who’ll take one look at The Masters champion’s green jacket and ask, ‘Does it come in different colours?’”

  • PGA player Rory McIlroy, on the casual approach Masters champ Dustin Johnson brings to the game: “See ball, hit ball, see putt, hole putt, go to the next.”

  • Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times: “Another sure sign it’s 2020: Illinois punted on fourth-and-goal against Minnesota. But then again, it was fourth-and-48.”

  • Headline at @NotSportsCenter: “Report: Trevor Lawrence says his doctors have told him he’ll be cleared from COVID to play football again as soon as the Jets draft another QB.”

  • Bob Molinaro of pilotonline.com (Hampton, Va), on Drew Brees’ injuries: “Broken ribs on each side of his body and a collapsed lung. Was Brees sacked or was his car T-boned?”

  • Molinaro again: “Grandma’s sweet potato casserole and collard greens haven’t given Thanksgiving Day revellers as much gas over the years as the Detroit Lions.”

  • Steve Simmons of the Toronto Sun: “History and irony: The mayor of Montreal is calling for all the citizens to wear masks. Her name is Plante.”

  • Simmons again, on the White Sox hiring manager Tony LaRussa, one day after he was charged with drunk driving: “The original LaRussa hiring was described as LaRussa 2.0 in Chicago. Now it’s being called LaRussa 0.8, as in his blood alcohol numbers”

  • RJ Currie of sportsdeke.com: “Vasek Pospisil’s three-set loss in the Sofia Open final made Canadians 0-6 in ATP finals in 2020. You might call it Mission Im-Pospisil.”

  • Headline at theonion.com: “N.Y. Jets Sued For Millions After Using Unlicensed Cheering Sounds From Other Teams”

  • From fark.com: “Century Link Field renamed to Lumen Field because ‘Our Defence Blows Field’ was too long of a name”

  • Janice Hough of leftcoastsportsbabe.com, on college football trying to flail its way through a pandemic: “Maybe it’s not just the players but NCAA powers-that-be we should be checking for concussions.”

  • Saints coach Sean Payton, reluctant to answer a question about injured quarterback Drew Brees: “No update, I’m eating a bagel. I was hoping to be chewing it when you asked.”

  • Patti Dawn Swansson again: “New Kim, a two-year-old female Belgian racing pigeon, recently sold for $1.9 million at auction. No bird has ever landed that large a windfall. At least not since Elin Nordegren flew the coop on Tiger.”

Care to comment? Email brucepenton2003@yahoo.ca

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