A Few Jokes: The Crepes

Some people eat snails. They must not like fast food.

Someone asked me to explain what a portmanteau was. I tried, but it was hard to put in two words.

Every morning at breakfast for the past 6 months, I announce loudly to my family that I’m going for a jog, and then I don’t. It’s my longest running joke of the year.

It’s impossible to talk to my dad during breakfast because he still reads the newspaper. One can say he’s behind The Times.

I went to a haunted bed and breakfast in France. I left. The place was giving me the crepes.

I’ve got a lot of puns about people with crooked teeth. You’d better brace yourself.

My uncle loves watching soccer. He says he gets a real kick out of it.

A man on a business trip went out for breakfast. The waitress came to his booth and asked “What can I get you?” The man paused and said “I’ll tell you what- I’d like the special, but I want my toast burned to a crisp, my bacon rubbery, my coffee weak and when you bring me the food I want you to yell at me.” Puzzled, the waitress exclaimed “What? Are you crazy?!” “No,” said the man, “I’m homesick.”