Rock n Roll Funny Business

Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and life to everything.

— Plato

1. I rolled a rock down the hill with an elastic band around it, and It hit a passerby. My rock band, the rolling stones, was an instant hit.

2. I want to start a business similar to an ice cream truck, except we sell baked treats and play classic rock’n’roll music ... I’ll call it The Rolling Scones.

3. I never expected the vintage movie I was watching to end with everyone doing a dance popular in the early 60s which is inspired by rock and roll. It was a twist ending.

4. What do you call a cat that’s been listening to too much rock and roll? Def Leppard.

5. I learned today that 3 of the guys who performed on “Rosanna” and “Africa” also played on “Dust in the Wind”. Music journalist asked them why they joined the new band and they said “Toto? We aren’t in Kansas anymore”.

6. Kurt Cobain dies and when he opens his eyes, he’s in a big practice hall. Looking around he sees Cliff Burton tuning up, Jimi Hendrix and John Lennon warming up on microphones and adjusting their guitar straps to fit, and Jerry Garcia messing with his pedal steel guitar. Kurt ambles over to Jerry and says, “So, this is what heaven is like, huh?” Jerry looks up and says, “Heaven?” Karen Carpenter walks in, sits down behind the drum kit and says, “OK everybody -- ‘Rainy Days and Mondays!’ One, two, three …”